Recap: The Bachelor 16×04

We are now down to just 13 women from our original 25. This week Ben takes the girls to yet another place that’s really special to him or something: Park City, Utah.

We start the day off with date card #1, this time going to raspy-voiced Rachel. While Rachel’s packing we’re treated to a long montage of Kacie B. going on about how it makes her want to throw up when she sees Ben with the other girls, because she and Ben have a connection—just another case of women on The Bachelor that seem to be unaware that they are on The Bachelor. It is also another case of me getting tired of how often all the girls use the word “connection.”

Ben escorts Rachel from the resort on a helicopter ride while the rest of the girls watch jealously from the balcony. Ben and Rachel ooh and ahh over scenic Utah, then land by a lake and paddle off in a love canoe. They stop for a booze picnic and basically just stare at each other for 15 minutes. It’s awkward. Before the date, Rachel confessed in a talking head that she’s had communication issues in her past relationships, and you can tell that is going to be the theme of the night. They go to eat dinner (they never eat!!) in a cabin where more awkward small talk transpires. The highlight of the awkwardness was Ben saying, “You said … that if you weren’t in the relationship for the long haul, it wasn’t really worth doing, and that’s kind of a concerning thing,” with Rachel replying by changing the subject: “Yeah. This fire is hot…” Eventually, Rachel decides to “open up” about how she’s not good at opening up, and all is right in Ben’s eyes. Is it just me, or does opening up about not being able to open up not really count as opening up? Ben buys it, and Rachel gets rose #1.

Date card #2 is for another group date; this time including Jamie, Casey S. Blakeley, Lindzi, Samantha, Nicki, Kacie B., and Courtney. Courtney’s annoyed she’s going on a group date and that “They all want him to hate me and see the side of me that’s shutting down around them, and when I’m around him I blossom,” which, as usual, makes no sense. In another attempt of trying to look tough and outdoorsy, Ben takes the girls riding on horses to go fly fishing. This is actually the worst group date idea ever. Basically, everyone silently stood around trying to catch a fish while Ben tried to teach them fly fishing without really knowing what he was doing. Courtney says catching a fish can’t be much harder than catching a man, leading me to believe that she has probably actually put a hook through a man’s lip in an attempt to catch him. Because she is crazy. Courtney pulls Ben farther down the river to have some Ben time to herself. In a talking head, Ben gushes that he loves spending time with Courtney, and that “she just gets it.” Gets…what? Gets dumb? Creepy? A crazy look in her eyes? I just will never know what Ben sees in her. Courtney is the only one to catch a fish, making all the other girls super jealous, and of course, Courtney flaunts it in all the other girls’ faces.

That night the group date continues around the pool back at the resort, which means once again the girls are at each others’ throats for last-minute alone time with Ben. Ben has some normal talking time with Casey S. then Nicki, and then Samantha barges in to complain that she’s always on group dates. Good move. Ben is having none of it and tells her straight up that she’s been highly emotional on the group dates, she doesn’t seem like she’s taking this seriously, he doesn’t see a relationship with Samantha going anywhere, and she can just leave now. Samantha gives some tearful goodbyes and leaves the house. The rest of the girls are pretty rattled by the turn of events; except, of course, Courtney, who is all but maniacally laughing in the background. Thus, two out of my golden trio have now been sent home.

Ben then spends some alone time with Kacie B., but later steals Courtney away for a makeout session by the upstairs fireplace, and Courtney tells Ben she’s having a hard time sharing him with the other girls despite the fact that she’s a “strong, confident woman” (her words). Ben annoyingly cares what she thinks and is sad she’s having a hard time. To cheer her up, Courtney gets rose #2, even though Ben admits to the camera that he’d originally planned on giving someone else a rose (my guess is Kacie B.). When Courtney sees she’s getting the rose, we see clips of her repeatedly saying, “Winning!” with her maniacal laugh. SICKKKK. I have a terrible feeling the final two will be between Kacie B. and Courtney, which is kind of hilarious because they are EXACT opposites. But Ben is dumb and probably can’t see that.

Date card #3 arrives and this time it’s for…Jennifer!! (muh fave). Ben takes Jennifer to a hole in the ground crater so they can bungee in and jump into the water beneath. Ben wants to see if “Jennifer will take this plunge” with him. Which is the cheesiest. Yet again, Ben chooses a girl who’s scared of heights ands makes her face her fears with him so that he can psychologically manipulate her into depending on him (again, basic Stockholm syndrome). Thankfully, not a hair on my precious Jennifer’s head is hurt and they drop safely into the water. They share a romantic bonfire until the sky opens up and they run through the rain. Jennifer gets rose #3 and they go to a Clay Walker concert and share cute moments and stuff. Ben says he can’t wait to spend more time with Jennifer and that he can see himself ending up with her (YES).

And now for the Turning Point. I think the obvious trend is that the cocktail party = drama. Ben says to the camera that he’s pretty sure his future wife is amongst these ladies, so things are getting real. Enter: drama. Emily feels it’s her duty to tell Ben that one girl (Courtney) in the group is totally different around him than she is around the other girls. Ben tells Emily she shouldn’t be worrying about the other girls, and it will probably be her demise if she does. So basically, this whole plan to expose Courtney completely backfired. Emily comes back and tells Jamie how things went (badly) and Casey S. is astounded that Emily thinks Courtney is fake, because apparently she and Courtney are BFF (I was shocked to learn that Courtney had any friends on the show) and Casey S. says Courtney is awesome and one of the most genuine girls. Casey S. goes off and tells Courtney what Emily says, interrupting Courtney’s intimate lounge time with her rose.

Courtney makes the only intelligent comment she’s ever made by pointing out that it was stupid of Emily to waste her one-on-one time with Ben by talking about another girl, which is true. Emily starts to worry that what she said is going to make Ben send her home, and she moves her mouth around a lot. Courtney is super mad and confronts Emily about it. Everyone else except for Casey S. and Jamie have no idea what’s going on, so all the girls watch in confusion as Courtney and Emily have a thinly veiled cat fight in the midst of like 8 other girls.

We head to a much less intense rose ceremony than last week. Jennifer, Courtney, and Rachel are safe with roses already from their dates. Roses go to Lindzi, Jamie (who has honestly barely existed up to this point), Nicki, Kacie B., Elyse (how is she still on this show? Who even is she?), Blakeley (raise your hand if you miss Blakeley drama), and Casey S. Ben comes down to his last rose, which will go to either Monica or Emily, and it goes to…Emily. Luckily for Emily, Monica is a no-shocker to be sent home and so Emily is safe for another week. Luckily for us, we get our very first car confessional and get to watch Monica cry and ramble about random things on her way home.

With all this Courtney drama, I am very interested in hearing Ben’s reaction to how Courtney behaves as he watches the show airing now. I hope she’ll get kicked off soon and we’ll find out, but I have a feeling she’s bewitched him for the long haul.

Watch new episodes of The Bachelor on Mondays on ABC at 8/7c. Next week’s episode on Jan. 30 is a new episode.

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About Kailee

Offering TV opinions and trivia to anyone that will listen since 2003.

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